I fired off an honest note yesterday. My goal was to maintain my appreciation for the individual, my disdain for their actions and my concern re: the progress of our volunteer group’s goals.
My email read something like,
I’m rooting for you and I’ve got your back, but you’re taking up space without being present and it’s causing us to stagnate. Anything that’s not owning up and coming up with an action plan is a cop out. Let’s figure this out. If you need to step down, I got your back.
That’s how I want to lead/participate. If I’m invested in the success of something, that’s how I run.
I fail. I let my friends down. More than I should. Regardless of triumph or disaster there are a few things I want to do right:
- Be clear in my communication
- Be honest in my opinion
- Be transparent in my sharing
The balance of ‘speaking my mind’ and taking others feelings into account is fuzzy. I know there’s always something I can do differently. For instance, picking up the phone.
Someone I look up to once said to me,
“don’t write when you can talk, don’t talk when you can wink, don’t wink when you can nod’ which means that as you react to something or have general issues, think about the best way to communicate, especially when heated and wanting to send a note, tweet, text, etc. give that some thought.” Dan Harbeke
Here’s to growth and navigating our gray.