Last night I had a blast getting to know the Toronto Global Shapers. We played Connect and surely made a ton of memories. There are dozens of gems that dropped-that have either found themselves recorded into my phone, tweeted from my account or etched into my memory. There is one question in particular that gave me the space to consider something that’s been teasing my thoughts for some time. Connect’s quick nature doesn’t give you a chance to BS. I was surprised with my answer and am convinced that it is a true picture of me today.
What is one thing you won’t joke about?
I joke a lot. One thing I can’t joke about is responsibility in relationships. I want to know every person around me has my back. I want them to know I’ll have theirs.
Without this, I cannot with good conscious allow myself to be there.
I’ll deescalate our relationship.
And that’s okay. It doesn’t mean that they are a bad human. It just means they can’t have my time right now. That when they hit me up–they will not be my priority. That they can ask questions, but I’m have not liable to answer.
This isn’t a forever state. It’s just a state of being in a specific point in time that works. The people I’m closest to are the people whom I know have my back.
I adapted this practice over the last two or three years as a result of understanding self-love. Self-love is healthy. It’s helped me grow in boldness and risk appetite. When my rope is held tight I can be a bit more bold. I can lean a little further of the edge. Sure, I can tie my rope to a foundation and go about life myself, but as old African saying chimes: if you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go far go together.
I can be the man that I aspire to be when the people around me are in it with me.
Anything less isn’t worth it for me.