2020 broke my heart–over & over again.
I’m grateful for its blessings and challenges. Anytime I felt like I had an edge on it, I found myself drowning. Constant fear, paranoia and concern reigned my life. Life moves quickly and those fleeting moments are there for us to dance–living our authentic truth. I am unable to neatly describe to you the biggest loss; dreams, lives, loved ones–vanished.
This year everyone needed more than anyone had to offer.
In this moment of gut-wrenching defeat, I recognize the familiar warmth of the Sun rising again and reminding me to stay true to the course and lessons along the way: that I am a work in progress, that I have come far and that falling short of my best shouldn’t hamper the experience of living. That good-enough is okay; trust that people will be honest in their gratitude, affirmations and critiques.
If you don’t tame your ego, life will tame it for you.
Healing, learning and nourishing myself is top of mind as I remind myself that control is feeble, flexibility is king. Authenticity and curiosity are the sparks that power me, igniting my soul and connection to The Devine.
By doing the inner work of emptying the vessel, I hold space for Gods plans to take hold. From that space, beyond wrongdoing and rightdoing, as a mirror, I witness others find a reflection of their own light; embers catching flame as they inch closer to their own truth–beyond permission and training.
I remember the value of patience and compassion: The Journey is long, scary as it was and is for me. All of us move at different paces. Hold space with gentleness, I remind myself.
2021 is a time for deep inner work, by way of Surrender.
Clearing out the vessel and pouring into myself, so that I can show up confidently and compassionately when moments arise. In surrendering, my intention is to understand myself more deeply. This matters because I want to live a life built on hope and not fear of what may come. I know I can achieve this because I have walked a long journey and have made difficult decisions moving me further from comfort and closer to the partner, father, son and friend that I aim to be— my highest self.
We will grow, should we seek to. We will change, should we steel ourselves and move through the flame. We are capable— maktub–it is written, imagine the joy when The Guide & Infallible Teacher, the most glorified, witnesses you and I take up those lessons and grow, displacing fear with hope and moving into the fields of what is possible.
This is cultivated with self-love, inner peace, gratitude, expansion and an abundance mindset. The Path to wholeness is and should be individual. Strength here awakens relative thinking and stronger bonds.
The heart wrenching troubles of 2020 do not rest at the doorstep of 2021. Those we have said goodbye to do not magically return. The moments ahead of us, may we seize with compassion and excitement; the ability to stand in oneness with the self- in pain, in possibility and above all— in our personal authenticity; powering our highest self and others who bare witness to that flame.
Future marv and friends, I love you dearly. May we keep Hope- forging forward, recognizing security within ourselves and finding moments of courage to make decisions from a place of hope and not fear.
No matter how dark the Night, the Sun rises tomorrow.
Onwards & Upwards
Marv – New York, 1/1/21
God, make me an instrument of your peace.Giovanni di Pietro di Bernardone, later Francis of Assisi (1181-1226)
Where there is hatred, let me bring love.
Where there is offence, let me bring pardon.
Where there is discord, let me bring union.
Where there is error, let me bring truth.
Where there is doubt, let me bring faith.
Where there is despair, let me bring hope.
Where there is darkness, let me bring your light.
Where there is sadness, let me bring joy.
O Master, let me not seek as much
to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved as to love,
for it is in giving that one receives,
it is in self-forgetting that one finds,
it is in pardoning that one is pardoned,
it is in dying that one is raised to eternal life
On the last day of every year I visit the year behind me and set intentions for the year ahead of me. These aren’t resolutions–they’re intentions for alignment and purpose. Visit older posts: 2019, 2018, 2017, 2016 ,2015, 2014 , 2013